Raising Capable Kids: The 12 Habits Every Parent Needs Regardless of Their Child’s Label or Challenge

Winking’s 2021 memoir, Capable, reflected on raising a son with Sotos syndrome, which is characterized by low muscle tone and developmental delays. That experience informs this empathetic guide on how parents can encourage children who have disabilities or are neurodivergent to be more independent. Outlining “habits” parents should follow, Winking advises readers to “send your child the message that you think they are capable,” recounting how she lets her son spend “an uncomfortably long time” inserting straws into juice boxes because succeeding in doing so boosts his confidence. Parents should lean into a child’s “natural curiosities to build agency and skills,” Winking contends, suggesting that if they have a special interest in horses, signing them up for a riding club could give them experience socializing. Elsewhere, Winking encourages parents to let children make their own decisions when possible and to ensure their own “fears don’t get in the way of their child’s growth.” The thoughtful guidance emphasizes the importance of setting realistic expectations while challenging children to get outside their comfort zone, and Winking brings a welcome recognition that “what capable looks like depends on your child’s developmental level and life circumstances.” Compassionate and sensible, this will be a balm for parents of children with disabilities. (June)